passport precious

If you're lucky, you live in a small town in the boons so the only way you can get your passport is to send it in by mail way ahead of time and be done with it. If you're like me, you're really smart (and when i say smart, i mean completely retarded) and wait til the very last possible minute (and when i say wait, i mean forget) to get your passport and have to go into the dreaded passport office.

Hailing from a small town in the boons, i wasn't sure what to expect from my very first passport office experience. As soon as i walked in i could feel the tense energy in the air. The Guard at the door (who had to have been at least 80 years old and could have been taken out by my 8 year old cousin) ushered everyone into a line up where they stared ahead until it was their turn and raced to the counter. Once they got all their papers and crap into a little bag, they gripped onto that bad boy like they were gollum and that bag was the freakin' ring of mordor. Then they sat and waited, intensely staring at the automatic number system, only looking away to scan the room to make sure no one is going to try to steal their precious. I was looking around and caught one guys eyes, and i swear he looked TERRIFIED of the fact that i was looking at him! Ok buddy, just becuase my name sounds like "Shire", i'm really short and i kind of resemble samwise gamgee, doesn't mean i'm a hobbit who's trying to steal your precious. Calm yourself.